dance upon the architecture


Man this breakup is not going so smoothly as I thought it would.  I can’t acknowledge the fact that I may have made a mistake.  Like I gave away my winning lottery ticket..

and I sent all those letters to myself in the future about him, gahhh what a bad choice.

The Water Cycle

Falling in love with you was a kind of melting, and
falling out of love with you wasn’t at all like rebuilding
ice cubes out of fog, but rather
evaporation, condensation, and then the rain
once more.

My heartbeat keeps me awake at night
and I don’t understand what language it speaks in so
I put a stethoscope over my chest and plug
it into my laptop,
but Google Translate
still hasn’t found how to translate water into words,
or an ocean into a novel
about the back of a whale’s throat.

The heart
is never as simple as a one-liner.

The heart
is a burning shipwreck under four thousand layers of sea.

What I’ve come here to do tonight is this —
salvage what I can from the wreckage
so that I can rise again, like a phoenix, into my own
skin.

I touch you and my heart undergoes the water cycle.
Evaporation and condensation, and then
always,

this rain.

“The Water Cycle” – Shinji Moon

It’s funny how the night moves

I believe this is what one would call a desolate wasteland.  Seriously I feel like I am on Mars.  Where did all the trees go?  Or did Mott just never have any?  Also why are all the roads covered with gravel?  I swear it is possible to go days without seeing another human being here.  I’ve been reading through some of my old notebooks with a mixture of amusement and something else that is a bad emotion.  ( I was going to google “bad emotions” to figure out what it’s called but eh…)

And I learned about the blues from this kitten I knew, her hair was raven and her heart was like a tomb.
-Gaslight Anthem

six months

 

I throw myself at
anonymity
inhabit turtle shell
back alleyway
shadows
sleep for 13 hours a night
lose my ability
for metaphors
quit writing
quit singing
quit college
I take on mannerisms
that would make my former self
look like a
bellowing lumberjack
I know it threw you
to watch a butterfly
devolve into
a caterpillar again
reverse Darwinism
disappearing wings
star turned black hole
_____________________________________
my writing is VERY sub par lately but I will work on that.  It’s like learning how to breathe again.  Not that I can remember the first time I learned how to breathe.  anyways I lost six months due to … well.  I did not write this during those six months but to be honest I didn’t really write anything.  Just laid in my bedroom and watched like thirty episodes of “Community” a day.  I’ve never referenced a lumberjack in a poem. Oddly enough I mention lumberjacks in real life quite a lot.